Best Questions to Ask a Girl

10 best questions to ask a girl

8:00am: You are at your local coffee shop grabbing a morning brew on the way to work.

“I’ll take a small cafe americano please,” you say warmly to the barista.

“Coming right up.”

You head over to pick up your coffee where everyone is expectantly awaiting their orders before going about their day. Then, suddenly, a familiar voice addresses you:


Your gaze locks with a pair of beautiful hazel eyes. It’s her again.

As you hear her voice, your heart skips a beat…

“Good morning. How are you?”

“I’m doing well, and yourself?”

“I’m fine, thank you.”

Then the brief exchange falls precipitously silent, and tension begins to mount.

Beyond a few simple pleasantries, your conversation with her never really progresses beyond superficial small talk.

You pretend to play on your phone and act busy as a few minutes pass.

“Small cafe americano!”

“Yes, thank you.” You quickly grab your coffee, and turn for the exit.

Why do I always freeze up when she talks to me? Why do I always get so nervous? Why can’t I just get to know her?

If you’ve ever had a crush on a girl, you’ve probably experienced this too. Your blood pressure rises as your ideal girl is in your vicinity. Your anxiety prevents you from getting to know the girl of your dreams, and it frustrates you.

In this article, we’ll uncover how to better get to know the girl of your dreams.

We’ll cover a wide variety of questions types, from dirty and sexual questions to ask a girl to funny and flirty questions to ask a girl.

Although you can start with some interview questions, the spectrum of different question types will add a dimension to the conversation that will create a mysterious, sexual, and fun persona that will help you attract and get to know your ideal girl.

deep questions to ask a girl

So what are the best questions to ask a girl?

Let’s discuss the layers of questions you can ask in order to intimately get to know a girl quickly, to the point where she feels a deep connection with you and is profoundly aroused by you in the span of a single night.

How to come up with questions

When you first start a conversation with a girl and you’re trying to get to know each other, questions are often necessary. However, it doesn’t necessarily have to be the standard “where are you from?”/”what do you do for a living?” interview questions. Instead, it’s best to first know what kind of girl you are looking for.

Do you know your ideal girl? When is the last time you really thought about what qualities your ideal girl would possess? Not just physically, but also in terms of personality and life experience.

What value would she add to your life? If you don’t have a clear idea of who you are, what you can bring to the table, and what kind of girl you are looking for, then you will most likely run out of things to talk about and she will walk away mid-conversation.

So before we proceed, I want you to list at least 5 non-physical attributes of your dream girl. As an example, here is my list:

  1. Open-minded and adventurous: a girl who is willing to take risks in life and not settle in a comfort bubble.
  2. Positive outlook on life: I can’t stand a girl who worries about petty things. If she can see the bigger picture and stay positive beyond minor inconveniences, then I will enjoy spending time around her.
  3. Gratitude and humility: If a girl ever asks me to buy her a drink when I first meet her, then I will immediately walk away and tell her to have a nice night. On the other hand, if a girl offers to pay on a date or pay for her drink, then I will reciprocate her gratitude to the utmost. The more entitled and arrogant the girl is, the more turned off I am.
  4. Intelligent and witty: I have a dry sense of humor where I make a lot of sarcastic remarks. If a girl understands my humor, then I’m attracted. If she is able to dish it back, then I’m hooked.
  5. Honesty and independence: If a girl is brutally honest about things and is willing to say anything on her mind, then I highly respect her. I hate superficial pleasantries and girls who try to be passive aggressive. I’ll play along, but they won’t be my ideal partner.
  6. Shy and introverted: This one is quite particular to me. A girl who is more shy, but once you start talking to her, you see that she’s quite observant, intelligent, and witty, then I am massively attracted to her.

With each of these attributes, I have a line of questioning associated with each one. If you have 2 questions for each attribute, then you immediately have 10 questions to ask a girl:

    1. Open-minded and adventurous: Where have you travelled to? What do you want to do in life? What’s the craziest thing you’ve ever done?

      For these questions, I care more about the way she responds than the answer itself. For example, if she has never travelled out of the country before, but really wants to and is enthusiastic about the prospect of new adventures, then I highly respect that girl. However, if a girl has no desire to experience new things or to travel to new places, then she is not the girl for me.

    2. Positive outlook on life: What has been the biggest struggle or challenge in your life?

      Similar to the first question, I gauge to see how she answers this question. If she describes her challenge and begins to gripe and bitch for a good length of time about how difficult her life is and is clearly seeking a pity party, then I’m more than willing to walk away. If, however, she talks about how she’s grown from her past struggles, then she’s won more respect in my eyes.

    3. Gratitude and humility: What is the thing that you value most in life?

      Generally, if the girl’s answer is some luxury good, she chooses it for its prestige and price rather than sentiment (e.g. it was her grandmother’s watch that has been passed down through her family), then I typically won’t get along with that girl. I have a hard time relating to girls who are purely superficial and idolize the Kardashians. Instead, a girl who values something more thoughtful and meaningful, like family or freedom, I will tend to have a higher respect and attraction towards. I make exceptions if the girl is clearly joking in her superficial response.

    4. Intelligent and witty: What was the last book you read? Who’s your favorite comedian?

      I can typically gauge her interests and how much she values intelligence by what she reads. Also, her taste in comedy and entertainment comedians tells me a lot about her sense of humor.

      But usually, I’ll make a bunch of sarcastic remarks and see how the girl reacts.

    5. Honesty and independence: I’ll ask her a challenging question, like “have you ever had a threesome before?” “how old are you?” or “when did you lose your virginity?”

      The way she answers these questions more than the answer itself tells me about her personality. Is she dramatic, emotionally reactive, and takes offense easily?

      Girls who are insecure will tend to crumble under the pressure of these questions, but girls who are more independent are confident will answer these questions with a vibe of pure, flowing honesty.

    6. Shy and introverted: Do you know your Myers Briggs personality type? If so, what is it? I’m quite well-versed in Myers Briggs typology and personality psychology, so this question is suited for me. But, typically, I get along with INxx types the most.

By having a clear idea of what your values are and what you’re looking for, you’ll immediately stand out from the average guy.

interesting questions to ask a girl


Well, when two people are getting to know each other, there is a “buyer” and a “seller.” Almost always, the person who approached first is the seller.

This might seem counterintuitive, but when a person approaches a stranger for the first time, the approacher is investing significantly more to get the interaction started.

Thus, if a man approaches a woman at the bar, he is selling himself to the woman: that is, he is the one trying to win the woman’s attention and attraction. Anytime a man is trying to prove himself or impress the woman, he is “qualifying” himself to her. Therefore, the seller is trying to qualify himself to the buyer.

This is akin to a job interview where the employer is the buyer and the prospective employee is the seller. The prospect hands over a resume containing his or her qualifications and tries to convince the employer that he or she is qualified for the job.

Nevertheless, if you are the one qualifying her in the interaction, then suddenly you become the buyer and she is the seller.

Once she tries to prove herself to you and win over your attention, then she likes you.

Also, be aware that qualification can be incredibly subtle. You might mention that you graduated from UCLA, and she might say, “Oh, I went to college in California too.”

She is volunteering this information without having to, and she is also suggesting that she is well-educated has shares commonalities with you. This is a definite sign that she is at least interested in you.

More overt signs of qualification would be if she tries to impress you: “I actually went to UC Berkeley. It’s a pretty decent school, and I had to work pretty hard in high school to get in.” Here, the girl would clearly be trying to impress you. The more a girl qualifies to you, the more she cares about what you think about her.

best questions to ask a girl

So how can you elicit qualification?

Be the buyer.

And you do this by knowing exactly what you want for your ideal partner. Most importantly, you must be willing to walk away from her if she does not live up to your standards. Don’t just settle.

If she senses that you are willing to assert yourself when she does not live up to your standards, she will sense that you are truly a man with purpose, who knows exactly what he wants and goes after it shamelessly.

Furthermore, as a result of knowing who you are and what you value, you will find that you will be much more calm and assertive when talking to people. You will be looking past beauty and appearances and really strike the core of who people actually are, and, in turn, the most attractive girls and highest value people will appreciate that the most.

The more a girl is praised for her beauty, the more she is surrounded by inauthenticity. Hot, gorgeous women are constantly bombarded with compliments and guys trying to “be nice” to them in the hopes of hooking up.

Ultimately, once you delineate your standards and ask her questions that are meaningful to you, you will immediately differentiate yourself from every other guy who is attempting to hit on her.

good questions to ask a girl

Overall, with these questions, you will get to know a girl quickly and see whether she’s a good match for you.

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Dirty Pick Up Lines

Dirty Pickup Lines

“I’m Asian, so I’ll eat your cat”

“They call me a fireman because I turn on the ‘hoes’”

“Are you a flappy bird? Because I could tap you all night…”

Dirty pickup lines. We’ve all heard them. But the question is, do they actually work?

Short answer: no.

Long, more nuanced answer: sometimes.

Pickup lines “work” on some girls, but not in the way you want them to.

Yes, they can get a cheap laugh, but, 99% of the time, the result will be a light, playful interaction without any substance and a fake number.

Rarely will they get you dates, sex, or a girlfriend.


Because using dirty pickup lines automatically puts you into two categories that turn off women: 1) you’re only talking to them to get laid, and 2) you aren’t spontaneous.

If you show too much sexual intent towards a woman without her emotionally invested in you, then she’s going to be turned off.

Imagine if a random girl whom you’ve never met kept looking at you from across the cafe every couple of minutes. Finally, 10 minutes later, she walks up to you nervously and says, “nice package…let me unwrap that for you” in a serious monotone voice. Scary.

Yet, somehow, guys think that this approach will work. They believe that the content of the pickup line is enough to create attraction without having the right vibe or emotion.

But if you show intent without actually feeling the emotion associated with the intent, you become creepy.

Moreover, girls are turned off when guys immediately are just trying to get laid and don’t care about enjoying an actual human interaction. These guys view women as sex objects and the interaction as just a barrier between his penis and her vagina.

When this happens, the girl’s biological defense mechanisms tell her subconscious that the guy is a threat. She feels objectified, and the man shows no empathy towards her.

As far as spontaneity goes, a woman enjoys a man who is able to remain present and enjoy the interaction for its own sake. When he starts to over-think what he’s going to say in order to get her to like her or to be attracted to him, she feels that needy behavior and is turned off.

This can even be conveyed in subtle ways when the man is using rapport seeking language and tonality. Compare the following two conversations:


Him: “Hey. If you were a squirrel, would you help me bust a nut?”

Her: “Haha.”

Him: “How are you?”

Her: “I’m good.”

Him: “That’s good. Where are you from?”

Her: “Los Angeles.”

Him: “Oh, cool. What do you do?”

Her: “I’m a teacher…”

Him: “Oh nice. My sister’s a teacher… So…do you like this place?”

Her: “Yes…hey, it was nice meeting you!”


Him: “Wow, what’s with the leather jacket Easy Rider?”

Her: “Haha”

Him: “I’m pretty sure they outlawed that outfit after 1970”

Her: “Hahaha, stop it…”

Him: “It’s all good. I accept you for the rebel that you are…”

You can tell even by the context of the conversation that, in the first conversation, the guy is talking to her just because he either wants her approval or wants to get laid. All of his statements and questions reflect that he’s talking out of uninspired obligation.

The second conversation reflects a more playful vibe where the guy is just having fun with some teasing and banter. His comments are spontaneous and situational. Instead of having a premeditated canned line, his remarks are free flowing and his vibe is present.

In order to better get to know a woman, it is important to know good questions to ask a girl.

Here’s a final point about pickup lines: the higher self-perceived attractiveness the girl has, the more perceptive she will be to intent and premeditation.

What does this mean?

Basically imagine an aspiring actress and model living in Hollywood.

She walks down Sunset Blvd and five guys give her a compliment on the way to the mall. Clearly, she’s going to be more acutely aware to when a guy is interested in her looks than a girl from small town Kentucky who gets hit on once a year.

Further, the Hollywood girl is going to grow quickly weary of the compliments.

Imagine when you break your leg and have to wear a cast for three months. The first week, you’re excited to tell the thrilling story of you speeding down the slopes of Aspen on your snowboard while unsuccessfully trying to land an incredible 360.

By week 4, the story becomes, “I fell down…”

Just like the broken leg story, getting hit on gets old.

For an attractive girl living in the city, getting hit on is a regular event that she’s grown to dislike. Thus, when a random guy walks up to her and says, “Are you a tortilla”? Because I want to flip you over and eat you out!” she just rolls her eyes and walks away.

So what should you do?

Get in touch with what you really want to say. Think past your sexual attraction, and trust your intuitive, present self. When you take the pressure off of yourself of having to get a number or gain her approval, then your witty, spontaneous self comes to the forefront, and, before you know it, you’ll have an attractive girl falling for you.

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Cute Pick Up Lines

Cute Pickup Lines

I’ve previously written an article about dirty pickup lines, but I also wanted to address pickup lines that seem “cute.”

Yes, dirty pickup lines can be off-putting because they set off red flags that the guy is being intentful and wants to sleep with her right away, but what if the line is more “cute” than “dirty?”

A “cute” pick up line will work really well on a certain demographic. Usually, younger girls who are into anime and unicorn frappucinos will give this guy the time of day. However, what happens after numbers are exchanged matters more.

Enter Bill. He’s a cute guy. 5’8”, brown hair, radiant smile. He laughs often and has a quirky, goofy personality.

As Bill walks about the mall, he sees a cute girl wearing a Hello Kitty backpack about to walk into Tilly’s. Before she enters the store, he briskly jogs over and says, “If you were a vegetable, you’d be a cute-cumber.”

The girl giggles and beams back at Bill.

With this particular demographic, a cute pickup line will work extremely well. If the guy has the right vibe and a silly personality, then these sorts of lines are more likely to work.

But now imagine that Bill is on Hollywood Blvd and he spots a blonde beauty with a long flowing black dress in heels. She looks like she just came from a movie screening.

Bill runs over and says, “Excuse me, do you have a Band-Aid? Because I just scraped my knee…falling for you…”

The blonde woman gives Bill a polite smile and replies, “aww, you’re so sweet! Thank you! You made my day!” Then she quickly turns and walks in the opposite direction.

The result: both parties are momentarily happy, but Bill is left unsatisfied. Yes, Bill received a compliment and feels good shortly after, but he will never get a woman to see him as a sexual or romantic option with a line like that.

Cute pick up lines work for girls who are in high school and sometimes even in college. Nevertheless, once she has her bachelor’s degree and a real job, cute pickup lines will no longer capture her heart as they had done before.


Because once she’s left the bubble of academia and school-based social circles, she enters the real world, where guys go out of their way to treat her well in order to get her attention and validation.

When this happens, she always feels like guys are trying to get something from her. It’s as if she’s a lottery winner, and everyone is trying to get their share of her winnings.

Thus, when a random guy runs up to her and delivers his cute line, she appreciates the validation, but she doesn’t need to give hope to another man who will continually chase her for the rest of the year, trying to ask her on a date.

Instead, she wants a man who has high value, and a high value man would never begin a conversation with a pre-scripted canned opening line.

Imagine George Clooney.

Do you think he’d walk up to a beautiful woman, look at her up and down, and say “I wanna live in your socks so I can be with you every step of the way.” That would be weird…

Yes, he is George Clooney, so anything that comes out of his mouth would likely give her an orgasm, but she would be interested in him in spite of that line, not because of it.

Why wouldn’t Mr. Clooney use a cute pickup line?

Because he doesn’t have to.

If a man is able to engage a woman without investing too much effort in the “pickup,” then he comes off as very high value. Let me explain.

Most guys who are trying to pick up a girl will try to be witty while talking to her, and she can sense it. If a guy is trying to sleep with a beautiful girl, she can smell it off of him.

If, instead, a guy is genuinely having a good time just talking to her without any hidden intentions behind the interaction, then she can sense that too. She will feel his non-neediness when he responds with unstifled wit and he is able to tease her and joke with her openly. When he teases her and they both share a sincere laugh, this is the spark of attraction.

So what should you do instead? I can’t be George Clooney…

That’s true. But you can exhibit high value behaviors.

I’m not telling you to change your personality, but there are three characteristics of high value males that separate them from the rest of the pack: 1) groundedness, 2) charisma, and 3) leadership.

A grounded man knows who he is and what he values. When someone asks him what he’s looking for in a relationship, a friendship, life, or even for dinner, he immediately knows the answer, and he is convicted about it.

Grounded men are decisive. Grounded men make decisions and interact with others in a way that reflects their own self-awareness of what they want in any given situation.

A charismatic man is one who can have fun with anyone in any situation without an ego. He isn’t uptight, and he has a playful or positive demeanor.

Finally, a high value man is a leader. When he decides on something, he leads it forward with assertiveness but also with understanding. He’s not trying too hard to force his will upon others. He’s patient and is willing to listen to suggestions, but in a time of uncertainty, people will defer the decision to the leader.

So what do these characteristics have to do with cute pickup lines?

Basically, a cute pickup line will immediately disqualify you from the high value category. Cute pickup lines are definitely a step up from what most guys try to do (e.g. they’ll hint at intent indirectly by being overly accommodating, or they’ll purposefully try to insult the girl in order to get a reaction), but there is a glass ceiling for using pickup lines.

Thus, I encourage you to scrap the pickup lines and cultivate the qualities of an authentically attractive man, rather than the facade of one.

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How to Text a Girl

first text message to a girl

You’ve finally worked up the courage to approach a girl that you’ve had your eye on while on your way to work and something amazing happened…you got her number! Success!

You go to sleep pleased with yourself.

The following day in the early afternoon, you text her: “Hey rockstar, how’s your day been?”

You chuckle to yourself. Rockstar. How clever and playful!

A few minutes later, your phone buzzes. You excitedly slide your phone out of your pocket and swiftly press the home button to check your messages:

Mom: Hey I sent you a package. Have you received it yet?

Your heart sinks a bit. That’s ok, I’m sure the girl of your dreams, that stunning brunette with the jade eyes, is just busy right now. But as soon as she’s finished with grocery shopping, work, or whatever errands she’s running, she can’t possibly help but to send a message back. We had such a great, witty conversation!

But the momentary exhilaration is gradually replaced by anxiety. One hour passes. Then another. Then another. Before you know it, it’s midnight, and you’re about to go to bed, and she still hasn’t texted back. It’s been over 9 hours, and no response! How is this possible?!

For many guys, texting a girl is like solving a Rubix cube–as soon as you solve one side, the other sides become jumbled. Just as soon as you seem to have gotten the hang of it and you have a decent rhythmic back-and-forth conversation, the girl suddenly disappears.

Was her phone stolen? Was she abducted? Maybe she was murdered? Or possibly her thumbs were severed off in an unfortunate chainsaw accident…

Whatever the case may be, girls seem to suddenly vanish when you’re texting them, no matter how compelling or amusing the conversation seemed to be. Most guys just don’t know how to text girls.

So how are you supposed to know what to text a girl you just met? What are some cute things to text a girl? Simply put, what are the best texts to send a girl?

For years, I felt the same way when it came to texting girls that I was interested in. Then about a year ago, something interested happened that permanently changed the way I text girls–I became a nightclub promoter.

Suddenly, I had an abundance of girls to text and they were the ones constantly trying to hit me up vying for my attention. I realized that this is exactly how girls feel, especially very attractive ones, when guys are constantly asking how their day is going or inviting them out to dinner.

I quickly began to empathize with high-value girls who have to deal with their phones blowing up on a daily basis. Consequently, I began to text people differently.

My texting involved less thought, and, as a result, placed less pressure on the recipient. Then I noticed that people would respond back more often and more enthusiastically.

In this article, I will show you how to message a girl.

Most pickup advice when it comes to texting focuses on specific lines or the content of what’s said in the conversation. From my natural friends and through promoting, I’ve discovered that the formatting of the text is more important than the actual content.

Girls are more responsive to visual cues rather than logical ones, so the formatting of text messages is significant, and I’d say about 95% of guys get this wrong. So how do you format a text properly?

How to Format a Text Message

  1. Use more emojis. In the initial text game literature, most pickup advice would suggest that the use of emojis makes you appear less masculine; thus, you should avoid them. However, I’ve discovered that when I use emojis, it injects a certain degree of levity into the conversation. This makes the girl feel less pressure to respond. Whenever you can use an emoji in place of a word or use an emoji to punctuate an emotion, do it. Emojis make texts more colorful and expressive, and most girls respond well to that.
  2. Repeat the last letter of words. Do this especially when first texting a girl. The go-to text that I use as the first text after I get a girl’s number is simply her name with the last letter repeated multiple times.
    Examples: “Samanthaaaaa” “Heidiiiiii” “Sarahhhhhh”
  3. Use imperfect grammar and spelling, and avoid using periods or end punctuation. In particular, a lot of times I’ll put a space between the last word and a question mark if I’m asking a question, or I’ll eschew the end punctuation altogether.
  4. Use line breaks when texting. Basically, instead of typing a paragraph of prose, press send every time you reach the end of a phrase.
  5. Here is an example of a paragraph:
    “Hey, it was nice meeting you today. I really enjoyed our conversation, and I
    hope we can meet up later this weekend. See you around!”

    Compare that message to the following:
    “Nice meeting you today :)”
    “Let’s hang out this weekend [question face emoji]”
    “See you around [upside down smiley face emoji]”

    Line breaks, combined with the invocation of the previous principles, will make the message significantly more playful and carefree.

  6. Whenever you ask a question or make a request (e.g. asking a girl out to dinner or for drinks), also tease her. A video or phone call is preferable for setting up plans (I’ve described this later in the article), but if she’s too busy to pick-up, then this principle works well for setting up a date via text.
  7. In general, most guys would say, “hey Linda, let’s grab a drink tonight” when they want to ask a girl out over text. Now let’s make a few adjustments. Let’s add in line breaks, extend the last letter of the name, and add in emojis.
    “Let’s grab a drink tonightttt [drink emoji]”

    Now an additional adjustment to make is to add in one more text that teases her following your request. You can say,
    “Let’s grab a drink tonightttt [drink emoji]”
    “As long as you promise not to poison me [sick face emoji]”

    Now the slight push shows that you’re willing to tease her even when making a
    request. You aren’t fazed by the prospect of rejection like most guys are. Even if
    she turns down the offer, you haven’t lost much social capital because you’ve
    been playful the entire time. This means you can make another request without worrying about whether she’s going to respond or not. If she turns you down, then I’d tease her again:

    Her: “Lol”
    “I can’t tonight”
    “Have to work :(“

    You: “Actually that’s probably good because I haven’t written my will yet [shrugging man emoji]”

    Overall, these principles will demonstrate to the girl that you don’t give a fuck, which will, in turn, take pressure off of her. If you format your texts using these tips, you will undoubtedly see that girls will be more willing to text you.

When to Text Her

Another topic that is commonly discussed when it comes to texting a girl is when to text her. Many guys will become anxious when it comes to timing, but, at the end of the day, all that matters is that you hit the “send” button when you feel like it. Maybe it’s a bit sooner or later than she is expecting, but don’t obsess too much over the timing. The one general principle to consider when texting is don’t text her immediately back if she takes a while to respond, and don’t always immediately text back. Most of the time, you can text immediately, but if you’re busy with something else, wait until you’re done and then text her. Don’t drop everything to wait for her message to immediately send a response. If you’re too available and too eager to text her, then that will kill all of the tension and she won’t want to respond back.

However, the opposite of texting too much is worse. If you aren’t even sending a text in the first place because you want to appear aloof and nonchalant, then you won’t get anywhere in the conversation. In general, it is better to text her too much than not enough. If you overtext a girl, then you are at least on her radar, whereas a guy who texts her intermittently will become irrelevant quickly.

When to Call or FaceTime Her

When you’ve conversed a good deal over text or if you’re trying to set up a meetup soon, then I’d usually resort to a more intimate form of communication. I prefer video calling (i.e. FaceTime) because it is closest form to in-person communication. As a result she will be more engaged and more comfortable with your presence and will be more likely to want to meet up. It is also a bolder move than to simply keep things over text.

Calling is definitely better than texting and is a good alternative if the girl is too busy for FaceTime. Or maybe she feels self-conscious about the way she looks that moment or needs some privacy for the time being. Either way, it is always good to solidify meetup plans with a video call or phone call rather than propose the meetup via text.

Things to Avoid When Texting

  1. Don’t be too intentful over text. Don’t relentlessly hit on the girl over text, otherwise she won’t want to meet up. She’ll just think you’re trying to fuck her. Instead, just keep it light and playful. She will want to meet up with you because you are fun and funny, not because you want to have sex with her.
  2. Don’t engage in hardcore sexting. Yes, I’ll still tease a girl sexually over text, but I won’t go into graphic detail about “what I’m going to do to her later.” This one can be a matter of preference, but I find that usually the girl gets off on sexting. Consequently, she will either not feel the need to meet up or she will avoid actual sex in person when you do meet up. Of course, there are a fair number of girls who will immediately jump on you as soon as you enter her bedroom after a steamy sexting exchange, but sexting is an unnecessary risk from my perspective. It’s risky in the sense that, as a guy, I feel sexually unsatisfied after a sext session, and a girl is typically no more likely to want to meet up after sexting. In most cases, she will feel sexually validated without feeling any of the guilt of actually having to have sex.
  3. Don’t confess anything over text. Don’t confess your undying love for her over text (unless it’s clearly a joke). Don’t go into stories about how your father was an alcoholic or how you were a late bloomer over text, unless it’s done with an irreverent sense of humor. If you joke around about serious topics, then it comes across that you’re the type of person who doesn’t give a fuck. But if you get too serious over text, she will not want to text back. Texting is reserved for light and playful conversation only. No heartfelt essays allowed.
  4. Don’t be too random or unrelatable. A lot of guys will try to be shocking with their texts in order to get a girl’s attention. They’ll send messages like “Penguins can’t twerk” “Such a slut” or “I just saw your twin.” Although these messages might get a reaction out of the girl temporarily, a high-value girl will generally sense that you’re being disingenuous merely to get a reaction out of the girl.

    Instead, it’s better to be relevant to the girl and send something that will make her laugh or react emotionally while still being relevant to her. It should make you chuckle as you send it. Either call back to an inside joke that you share with her or tease her on something that is particular to her.

    The best ping text that I use is simple: her name with the last letter repeated. It’s not random, and it’s not unrelatable; it’s simple yet effective.

The next morning you wake up. 9:48am. Still no response. Now you think to yourself, fuck it. Now I’m just going to fuck around. I might as well. Nothing will happen otherwise.

“What’s gucciiiii [the winking emoji with the tongue sticking out]”

An hour and a half passes. Then you hear the staccato buzz of your phone.

“Heyyyy haha”
“How ru?”


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